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Hello there.

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I'm Jessica.

Once upon a time, I wrote a lot on this blog.

Now, not so much. But I haven't quite gotten around to totally delete it from the internet just yet. So, here it remains, collecting dust. 

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Lindsay Lohan fronts Sevin Nyne fake tan



Sevin Nyne? Noh Thenks. I just cannot imagine a worse poster child for fake tan... the perennially geranium-hued Lilo is not an aspirational figure. Although, maybe I'm too old? Maybe the tweens love her and want to look like her!? God help us all if that's the case... 

If I were trying to market a fake tan product at tweenagers and I needed a young celebrity that girls emulate in order to cash in on it, I would go for somebody else. Even that Vanessa girl who got in trouble in the states for getting out her babs. She's tan, right? Or why not Miley Cyrus (Well done, Billy Ray, well done)? How about one of those Hills girls? They're all young and hip and none look too much like a melting candle at the age of 20 (going on 46).

There has to be some up-and-coming, fresh California babe out here who'd be willing to front a fake tan campaign... maybe it was the misspelled name that put off potential suitors? After all, the only place you see things spelled like that normally is on the front of really seedy nightclubs or try-hard restos (with Wahaca being the exception. Blighty would have been entirely confounded by the Spanish spelling: Oaxaca). I guess the girl's gotta make a living. We all do. Just get a sub-editor.

If UR n2 being a kool kid, Sevin Nyne is 4 U.


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